Mum supported by Shared Lives says "I’ve proved a lot of people wrong”
Shared Lives, a council-run service, matches carers with people who need support. That care can be living in the carer's home or elsewhere – whatever works best for each situation.
Shared Lives helps people who need support to live independent lives including adults with learning disabilities, autism, mental health problems and more. The service can also provide parent and baby placements.
We spoke to Sandra, a Shared Lives carer with her husband Steve, and Heather, the mum they supported along with her new baby, to learn a bit more about their story.
Heather moved in with Sandra (64) and her husband Steve (70), both from Meols, in 2022 when she was pregnant. A couple of months later she would give birth to a beautiful baby girl, named Heidi.
Sandra said:
The original plan was she was going to go into a unit with the baby but that didn’t work out. She came and stayed with us and gave birth.
Heather was 27 when she moved in with Sandra and Steve, but she’d been in care since she was 12. She was excited to be welcoming a new baby into the world, but needed some support to help her get through.
Heather said:
My partner and I thought we couldn’t have kids, so I got pregnant without realising. It was a very big surprise.
When I left my previous placement to go to Sandra and Steve’s, I was at sea. I was heavily pregnant with a lot of emotions. They made me feel safe, comfortable and at home, I actually felt loved and wanted.
With the support of her Shared Lives family, Heather quickly took to motherhood.
Sandra said:
Heather has a learning difficulty that meant she needed support and her education had been disrupted. Nobody thought she’d be able to handle a baby. But with some support and guidance, she was so, so good. She had a lot of social workers involved, health visitors etc.
We taught her life skills and why we do certain things – learnt how to cook, money management, cleaning and managing a home - practical things. She became totally independent while she was here doing her own shopping and caring for her daughter.
Heather, Sandra and Steve developed strong bonds, through which all benefitted and Heather, in particular, thrived.
Sandra said:
Heather was lacking in confidence over time she flourished.
We are family, that’s how I look at it. We were there to support but it was more like a family. We would go out for meals, Heather and her boyfriend Rob would come to family gatherings and barbecues.
She said she felt like one of my daughters. She said I treated her the same way I treated my daughters, that made me feel so happy.
Heather moved out of Sandra and Steve’s home earlier this year, to her first independent home with Rob and Heidi. The transition was supported by the Shared Lives service.
Heather said:
We found somewhere to live but Shared Lives helped us. It was tiring. But we had good support network around us.
For this young family, now living in Leasowe, the future looks bright.
Heather said:
After a rocky start, I’ve come quite far and proved a lot of people wrong. They didn’t think I’d be able to cope, but with support from Shared Lives and therapy, I’m doing really well.
Heidi is too. She’s in nursery now and she loves it. She’s a happy and clever little girl, she’s just into everything.
Heather would recommend the service to anyone who needs this kind of support.
Heather said:
You get a tonne of support, they’re always on your side trying to help you progress. The help I got before and after having Heidi, I can’t fault them, it’s basically changed my life.
Shared Lives helps a wide range of people who need support to live independent lives, including:
- adults with learning disabilities
- adults with autism
- adults who experience mental health problems
- people with physical disability
- people with sensory impairment
- older people including people with dementia
- young adults transitioning from Children’s Services
Shared Lives placements can be long or short term, short breaks only or day support.
If you think you could benefit from support with a Shared Lives carer, or you might like to become one, you can:
- Find more information on the Council’s website here.
- Contact the team by email at sharedlives@wirral.gov.uk.
